Travel day Quatro

First of all before I get into the humor of our trip, I want to give all glory to God for the blessings he has paved before us on trip.  The weather thus far could not have been any better. We have seen snow everywhere from mountain caps, to scattered across the hills, to covering the roadside. Streams, rivers, lakes and ponds have all been frozen but the roads have been clear and the temperatures have been in the upper 40’s.  Thank you Lord!

Nebraska – pronounced Nuh-brass-Kuh – Origin Native American meaning rolling nothingness.

We are currently bedded down in Grand Island, Nebraska. Why in the heck they call it an Island when there’s NO water here is beyond me. Not to mention the extreme lack of anything “grand”.  For those of you who have never been to Nebraska, don’t! There truly is nothing here; and when I say nothing that is an extreme understatement. Unfortunately there is no other word that means more nothingness than nothing. I mean even the exits have nothing. No truck stops, no rest areas, just exits to nothing.

I have witnessed brief patches of evidence that would suggest there were some wheat and cornfields here at one time. But this time of year the fields are all plowed and disked and there is nothing. Nothing but dirt. I couldn't even find a cornfield to "lose" Grizz in. There are no steak farms, or wool farms, just what could be described as America’s largest dirt farm. Yep they raise dirt here and lots of it!

There has barely been any road kill since we hit Nebraska either. Even the wild animals are smart enough not to come here; at least most of them anyway. I did discover a new type of deer though, a spread deer. It’s amazing how far a tractor-trailer can spread a deer down the roadway. In fact it’s almost as far as a C-17 can spread a coyote down a runway.  Speaking of road kill, I have learned something else too!  Males are much, much smarter than females.  Before you ladies get your panties in a bunch I have hard-core data to prove that statement. Out of all the deer, and parts of deer I have seen scattered down the highways, and I have seen a LOT, not a single one of them were male.  Just saying….

 Even though Nebraska has been an abyss of nothing, nada, zilch, prior to that our day was still interesting.  It started when we checked out of our hotel in Laramie. The hotel manager’s last name was Disney. Now I am assuming no relation, or else she probably would not be working at a hotel in Wyoming. Who knows though, maybe her uncle was Walt and maybe, just maybe, she was just excommunicated from the family for having no imagination???? Or maybe she had a horrific fear of mice???? Or maybe she was just plain goofy??? Oh I am having too much fun with this. Moving on…

The roadways in Wyoming leave a lot to be desired. Starting near Cheyenne and sporadically carrying on to the state of nothing, I mean Nebraska. The roads were BUMPY! They were the cement kind and they were covered in the tar seams, lots and lots of seams that were very very very bumpy. In fact I am quite certain that my rectum has been compacted into my cerebellum and now I will have even more shitty ideas!

I also made another discovery in Wyoming. It was a Wal-Mart distribution center.  Now we all know that everything Wal-Mart sells is made in China. So apparently this is a distribution center for the “People of Wal-Mart”.  I knew there was no way that all those people just randomly showed up at Wal-Mart. They have a gigantic facility with hundreds of tractor-trailers lined up to sort and deliver the “people of Wal-Mart” to a location near you. A 400 pounder in a thong to Chicago, an anorexic 60 year old man with fake boobs to Albuquerque, you get the drift.  Once again my friends we have been had by a brilliant marketing scheme!

I am thrilled to say that we are over half way done with our journey. About 1500 miles down, and a thousand more to go. With the time I have spent in that Penske truck we have become intimately close. As any good driver operator knows, you learn to listen to the truck, you memorize her sounds. For instance I know when Ol’ Penske starts to moan that low sultry groan, that she is putting out a little more than she wants to and it also means she just hit 2100 RPMS. That means we are going all out, balls to the wall up hill. She is giving everything she’s got.  It also means I start praying a little bit harder. I think I can, I think I can….

I am also challenged to find ways to entertain myself in the cab all alone. I try not to eat of boredom now that I am tobacco free, so I chew on coffee stirrers. They are calorie free. I also make funny faces and snarl at passing vehicles, especially the kids. But mostly I have one helluva 6 hour karaoke dance party all by myself! So far no complaints.

Everyone is doing pretty well. We are taking it slow and easy, no rush, no hurry. Typically we get on the road by 0930. If you ask me that’s pretty good considering I have 2 females and 2 dogs traveling with me. Then we knock out about 5-6 hrs of driving and thus far the stops have been minimal. Bobbi is doing a great job navigating. The jeep has the GPS so she leads the way. She has learned my limitations in the big truck and plans accordingly, at least for the most part. And when she doesn’t, I am all alone in the truck and no one knows if I say anything ugly J  Not that I would ever…..

Tomorrow we are heading to Kansas City Missouri. There I will reunite with my old friend Ben from Iraq. Do you know what happens when TWO Bens get together? Nothing but pure awesomeness! It will be great to see him again after 5 years and I am super excited!

Since I started this off with a serious note, I want to end that way as well. Each day of driving I have found a great sermon on the radio to listen to.  Todays really gave me something to think about and I wanted to share it with you. Give you a little something to chew on.

In the Bible, Jesus teaches us to pray “Give us this day, our daily bread” But now days our cupboards, and pantries, and refrigerators are full of “daily bread”. It is abundance that ciphers our dependence. If you are blessed with a roof over your head, a house full of food, or healthy family, don’t let that abundance take away your dependence on the Lord.